Modern weddings are getting bigger, more elaborate, and more expensive, and the pressure isn’t just falling on couples. For the people standing beside them, the cost of saying “yes” to a wedding party role has become a significant financial and time commitment.
To better understand what it really costs to be a bridesmaid or groomsman in 2026, we surveyed over 1,000 Americans who have served in a wedding party within the past two years. Our goal: uncover how the experience differs by gender, what expenses feel most burdensome, and whether modern wedding expectations have crossed a line.
Here’s what we found about the growing cost gap between bridesmaids and groomsmen.
Key Findings:
- Bridesmaids spend an average of $1,110 per wedding, while groomsmen spend an average of $902. Meaning bridesmaids spend an average of 23% more per wedding.
- Bridesmaids are typically expected to spend 82 hours (3.4 days) on wedding party-related activities; groomsmen are expected to spend 70 hours (2.9 days).
- 10% of bridesmaids have gone into debt to be in a wedding party.
- Over 30% of bridesmaids report that being in the wedding party strained their relationship with the couple, as did 13% of groomsmen.
The Price of Showing Up
Being part of a wedding party comes with a price tag, but not an equal one. On average, bridesmaids spend $1,110 per wedding compared to $902 for groomsmen, a difference of 23%.
Travel to the wedding location is the single biggest expense for both groups. But bridesmaids face an additional layer of required purchases: beauty services, accessories, and appearance-related costs that groomsmen typically do not.
For bridesmaids especially, the list of expected purchases can feel endless before the wedding day even arrives.
Beyond dresses and shoes, many women reported paying for professional hair styling, makeup appointments, nail services, accessories, alterations, accommodations, and bachelorette party costs.
Beauty-related expenses consistently ranked among the purchases most likely to be viewed as unnecessary. Nearly 3 in 10 bridesmaids said professional makeup was an unnecessary expense, while 28% felt the same about mandatory nail appointments. Professional hairstyling and accessories also ranked high among frustrations.
Groomsmen, by contrast, were more likely to push back on bachelor party costs, food and drink expenses, and travel. The data points to a clear divide: women are more often expected to absorb a broader range of appearance-related costs simply to participate.
Adding to the frustration: more than 30% of both bridesmaids and groomsmen reported being asked to split costs they never agreed to pay for in the first place. Surprise group expenses are now a common source of tension between wedding parties and the couples they support.
Time Before the Big Day
The financial burden is only part of the equation. Time is the other currency being spent.
Bridesmaids average 82 hours of wedding-related activities per wedding. Groomsmen average 70 hours. That’s a 17% gap in time commitment.
From engagement parties and bridal showers to bachelorette trips, fittings, rehearsal events, and day-of logistics, bridesmaids frequently take on a larger organizational and emotional role throughout the entire process.
Many respondents said they were also asked to take on extra tasks beyond the standard wedding party duties, including:
- Decorating and setup
- Planning pre-wedding events
- Coordinating schedules for the group
- Assisting with DIY projects
- Managing logistics on behalf of the couple
The growing expectation that wedding party members double as unofficial planners, coordinators, and emotional support systems appears to be a significant driver of the stress surrounding modern weddings.
When “Yes” Costs Too Much
For many Americans, participating in a wedding party now requires genuine financial sacrifice, and some are starting to decline the invitation altogether.
1 in 10 bridesmaids reported going into debt to participate. Others cut spending in other areas of their lives, delayed personal purchases, or picked up additional work to cover the costs.
The numbers tell a clear story of financial sacrifice:
- 17% of bridesmaids and 15% of groomsmen said they took on a second job to afford wedding party expenses.
- 25% of women and 20% of men said they had declined a wedding party invitation for financial reasons.
- 23% of bridesmaids and 16% of groomsmen said they weren’t accurately informed about expected costs before agreeing to participate.
More than half of bridesmaids (52%) said they felt pressured into joining the wedding party despite their reservations. Among groomsmen, that number was 35%.
When nearly a quarter of participants say they were never told what the role would actually cost them, the issue isn’t just rising expenses. It’s a lack of transparency about what is being asked.
The Emotional Toll of Modern Wedding Culture
The financial pressures of being in a wedding party don’t stay financial for long. For many respondents, they ripple into relationships, mental well-being, and feelings about the wedding experience itself.
When asked about the most frustrating parts of being in a wedding party, both bridesmaids and groomsmen ranked cost and time commitment at the top. But their secondary frustrations diverged.
For bridesmaids, the top frustrations were cost, time commitment, lack of control over decisions, travel requirements, and feeling pressured to spend more than desired. Groomsmen shared the top two, cost and time commitment, but their remaining frustrations centered on travel requirements, coordinating schedules with the group, and the sheer number of wedding-related events.
The emotional gap between the two experiences is significant. For bridesmaids, the strain extends beyond frustration with expenses into the relationship itself. 1 in 3 bridesmaids report that being in the wedding party strained their relationship with the couple, as did 13% of groomsmen.
Across the board, many respondents expressed concern that wedding culture has moved in an unsustainable direction. 44% of bridesmaids believe wedding party expectations have become unreasonable, and 29% of groomsmen agree. Many participants said modern weddings now involve too many events, too many expenses, and too much social pressure to prioritize someone else's celebration over their own financial well-being.
The Bottom Line
Being asked to stand beside a friend or family member on their wedding day is still considered an honor by many Americans. But the data suggests that for a growing number of people, the role now carries financial, emotional, and social weight that wasn’t always part of the deal.
Between travel costs, beauty expectations, surprise group expenses, and rising time commitments, many wedding party members say the experience is becoming increasingly difficult to balance with everyday life. And while the pressure affects everyone, the burden continues to fall disproportionately on women.
As wedding culture continues to evolve, one question seems to be on more people’s minds: how much is too much to ask from the people standing beside you on your wedding day?
At Modern Gents, we believe every part of your wedding should feel meaningful, not financially overwhelming. That’s why we’re committed to making high-quality, beautifully designed rings accessible without the inflated price tag. Because the most important thing about your wedding day isn’t how much was spent to get there.
Explore Modern Gents’ collection of affordable engagement rings and wedding bands, designed for couples who want something real.
Methodology
We surveyed 1,105 Americans who have been a bridesmaid or a groomsmen in the past 2 years. Among them, 61% were women and 39% were men. Additionally, 55% were millennials and 45% were Gen Z.
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